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How to Love Your Life – 21 Steps

How to Love Your Life – 21 Steps

by Lucia Hoxhain English

I guess we all are continuously seeking to have a happier life, to be more free, to laugh more, to experience more joy and more of those meaningful connections with our loved ones.

Do you ever feel like you’re missing something, or do you want to learn how to live your life to it’s highest potential? If you’re not sure where to begin, you can start loving your life by discovering all the things that you’ve already got going for you (and going well); then removing things that are preventing you from feeling love toward your life and creating something newly instead.

Here are few tips from me about how to start:

1.) Check in with your current situation
Ask yourself if you are satisfied with your current situation in life. Are you in job, where you are doing something that motivates you and you feel passionate about it? Is your job meaningful? Does the work justify itself? Do you feel good about the work you’re doing? Does it give you energy (or are you coming home feeling completely drained)? If your answer to these questions is no, you may want to consider a new path for your life, whether that means working in a different field, changing a company, or finding a new place to live. Try to bounce these questions off of your friends, too. Tell them you’re trying to figure out if you’re living in a way that helps you to love your life.

2.) Clarify Your Own Core Values
What do you value most in life? If it’s your relationships with people, maybe you should be working with people in a field like psychology, social work, or some kind of activism. If it’s making a lot of money to provide for your family, maybe you should find a lucrative field that will allow you to make money doing something you enjoy, based on your interests.

If you aren’t living according to your highest values, you will have a hard time loving your life. Try to figure out what you value most and then plan your life around that, rather than blindly pursuing whatever opportunities may show up around you. If you’re unsure of what your values are, search online for a list of core values and pick out the 5 that resonate the most for you. Write short, clear definitions for each one based on what they mean to you, then think about what habits can help you cultivate those values.

 

3.) Try something new
If you want to ignite some sparks in your life, get yourself ‘out of the routine’ and comfort zone and put yourself out there trying new activities. Take up painting, fishing, woodwork, yoga, learning new language, try rock climbing, or something else that appeals to you. Bring a friend to have even more fun, so you guys can create shared memories for one day! Think about things you’ve always wanted to do but never gotten around to. This could be anything from writing poetry to learning how to ice skate.

4.) Continue with your Personal Development
It is very important we feel we are moving forward in life and personal development as well as education is a great way to open new doors and new opportunities as well as removing obstacles being in your way, so you can make a quantum leap forward in area of your life where you previously felt like you are being stuck. Developing yourself this way has been linked to higher mental health, social support, and other positive things. If you feel bored of daily routine or stuck in life or just want to bring greater satisfaction to your existence, consider going to college, take up the course and learn about the subject that appeals to you.

5.) Clarify for yourself what you want in life
It is very hard to life the life we love without knowing what that life would even look like. Without daring to dream and have a look. Many of my clients are so clouded by current problems they are facing, that it is even hard for them to see, that there is something else possible on the other side. Share with a good friend. Start writing a journal. Be in conversation asking yourself: “What would my life look like if Im to wake up every morning looking forward to a new day?”

6.) Reach out to a coach, therapist or a counselor
If you feel like you are miles away from truly loving your life, make a first very important step and reach out to someone who resonates with you. It is OK that sometimes we just get lost in life and not sure which way to go next whether its in our career or relatinoships. Be open to speak about your situation openly and dare to share about what would you really like your life to be like. Allow yourself to be guided by someone. This can makes the whole world of difference to your future life.

 

7.) Let go of negative people from your life
One of the biggest drains of love for your life is being surrounded by people who are constantly negative, whether that means criticizing you or just complaining about everything going on around them. Try to identify these people and distance yourself from them. It’s obviously more complicated if you are close to these people, like a parent or a best friend. In that case, you may want to try to help them figure out what’s going off the rails in their life, so that they can also learn to love their life or you may chose to set the firmer boundaries towards people who drain your energy. If you think some people in your life may be negative for you, start determining if those are destructive relationships by keeping a log of how those people treat you and make you feel.

8.) Surround yourself with loving people that empower you
Having positive, supportive people around you will reduce your stress and keep you happier. Loving your life isn’t a single person task, we all need the support and love of people we care about and respect. If you want to meet new people, try to find them in places related to your interests. Join a book club or find interest groups related to the activities you love, such as skying or visiting art galeries. Find friends that are also on their own personal development path, so you can support one another. Make sure to tell them how much you appreciate them and show them by doing things for them. Create love in your life as well as receiving it.

9.) Repair your relationships
If you’re having a lot of conflict with a friend or family member, if you’re not speaking to someone you care about, make an effort to repair the relationship. It is also important to complete on our past relatinoships, so the energy of ‘what happened’ doesnt carry on and filter through to our next experiences with people in life. Healthy relationships are important to your well-being and will significantly help you to experience the life you love.

Find the new way to communicate with people more effectively. You can say “I’m sad that we’ve been having difficulties lately. Is there anything you’d like to say to me, or anything I can do to make things better?” Even if you feel like it’s someone else’s fault, take the initiative to repair the situation for both of your sake. If the relationship is beyond repair, try to see it as an opportunity to complete it powerfully and then make new friends starting a new chapter in your life, rather than seeing it only as an ending or a failure.

10.) Start dating
If you’re single but you would like to be in a romantic relationship, put yourself out there to maximize your chances of meeting someone. Drop the worries about your age, history with men or that you are few kilos above your ideal weight. Your man can be just around the corner and with you vibrating in your beautiful feminine energy, absolutely anything is possible! You can join an online dating website or try an in-person dating service near you, such as speed dating. Alternatively, you can just pursue your passions and try to meet someone in the process. It’s easy to meet people if you’re in school, if you go to church, or if you have extracurricular activity groups that interest you. Be on the lookout for attractive people and those that you are feeling being drawn to.

Don’t be afraid to start conversations. If you think someone is attractive, find an excuse to make small talk with them. Who knows, you might hit it off! You don’t necessarily need someone to help you love your life, but it doesn’t hurt to have someone wonderful by your side.

 

 

11.) Join a cause larger than yourself
If you want to really love your life, you should search for activities you can join that reflect something bigger than yourself. Happiness and love are often found indirectly. It may seem appealing to get as much as you can for you and you alone, but this isn’t always sustainable or a very meaningful way to live life or love life.

You can try volunteering with a local soup kitchen or nonprofit organization dedicated to social justice. Even joining a band or a small group of people with a particular cause can help you feel connected with something larger than yourself.

12.) Spend time in nature
We really are not built to live ‘in boxes’. Getting out of the house and into nature, whether that means walking/hiking, camping, fishing, or just reading a book, can reduce depression and increase your overall health. A nearby park or patch of woods may be a good option.

You could also convince your friends to have a weekly forest hike, or outdoor run combining the positive benefits of exercise with spending time outside. If you don’t have access to many natural settings where you live, plan a weekend vacation with friends to get out of the city for a while or even spend more time in a local park.

13.) Start a gratitude practice
Gratitude has a number of proven benefits, from increasing your physical health to lifting your mood and reducing depression. It will also help you appreciate all the positive things in your life and begin to love it, even if there are negative things as well. No one’s life is perfect, but if you focus on the positive then you’ll be better able to handle the negative.

Create a gratitude journal. Try to write at least 5-10 things at the end of every day that you’re grateful for. This could be the affection and love of your pet, having a nice place to live, making good grades in school, making a good paycheck, having close friends, or being able to enjoy delicious food.

14.) Set up the daily routine that works for you
For me, my early morning regular practice of yoga and meditation is my lifeline. Lemon drink as soon as I wake up and noutricious breakfast followed by excercise. It took me some time to create my daily routine, especially as a mum of little twins, but it is totally possible all though, of course it is OK to have flexibility when circumstances like illness ocures, but having my daily routine helps me greatly to balance my busy life and empowers me to deal with the challenges as this way, I always ‘feed myself’ before I start feeding the others as a mum and a professional coach.

 

15.) Create a beautiful living space
I love my home. It is truly my sanctuary now, but it wasnt always the case in the past when I used to move around very often living back in the UK. Messy living spaces can actually have a powerful impact on your mind and emotional state. They can also signal to you that having a messy life is acceptable. They can also cause you to feel less powerful and less in control of what’s going around you. If you want to love your life, you need to feel a sense of mastery, like you are capable of handling the challenges that life will throw your way. With this in mind, be sure to keep your living areas clean, so that you won’t have this extra baggage of messiness in the back of your mind. Life is often ‘messy enough’, you want to have a clean, warm pleasant home to come to at the end of the demanding work day.

If there’s a huge mess to deal with, focus on one area at a time. You can also focus on different types of mess at a time: get all the trash out first, then put your clothes away, then deal with smaller miscellaneous items.

16.) Take a look at your work-life balance
It’s not always easy to cut back on work, but if you think you are overworking yourself and suffering because of it, try to find ways to correct that imbalance. Self-care has become a bit of a cliche but is essential. You have to protect time and space to keep yourself resourced, otherwise you have nothing to give to others and risk burning out. If you’re able, take a pay cut to work fewer hours or have fewer responsibilities or search for new jobs that would allow you more freedom to live your life.

17.) Make a “changes” list
Write down a list of things you’d like to change about your life that you think would help you love your life more fully. This could be anything from exercising more often to cooking more and eating out less. Try to focus on small goals at first, or lay out larger goals in manageable steps. It won’t help to plan to make huge lifestyle changes if you bite off more than you can chew and end up discouraged. Instead of planning to run a marathon, start with half a mile or a mile. That way you can feel accomplished at each milestone and keep your motivation up.

 

18.) Make a “Bucket” list
Keep on writing down everything you would like to experience in this life time. Get inspired by listening to your friends or documentary film on TV. Keep on writing and remember to make actual plans for gradualy ticking the boxes so you always have something to look forward to.

19.) Sleep and eat well
Make sure to get enough sleep and eat well, in addition to these other steps. Keeping your body healthy is an important part of loving your life. In fact, we can not fully enjoy anything if we feel bloated and/or exhausted most of the time. We then vibrating in very low energy and everything else in life then follows. We dont feel like doing excercise, we dont feel like we want to go out, try new things or maintain relationships with people around us. Giving ourself a mask, taking first after our most important needs is the most important thing. If you are reading this feeling constantly tired, you may also explore whether you are not suffering from a burn-out.

20.) Slow Down
If you’re rushing from place to place, it is going to be very exhausting and you may be thinking you are achieving a lot this way, but the very opposite may be actually true. Also, when you finally pause, you will find yourself being robbed of a true miraculous experience of living your life fully. So try to relax your pace and notice what’s going on around you and how this actually benefits you as well as those you love.

21.) Ask yourself the very important question
Is this what I am doing/saying/thinking right now is getting me closer or away from the life I truly love? The answer to this will give you the way whether to continue, stop, or change something in order to get closer to your dream life.

 

Wink - Lucia Hoxha | Yoga | Lifestyle Coach | Online Yoga for Women

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